Months of hedging around the issue and it finally came to this.  So perfect in every way, who knew it would be our last.  But baby, what a way to go. 

We always had our rules.  We never got personal, an email or text to arrange place and time.  No feelings allowed – simply a physical thing with no strings attached.  And no sex – just fooling around.  Never crossing that line when we’re alone together. 

But slowly the rules slipped.  Phone calls instead of messages, talking about our lives, our feelings for other things.  And that line forever breached one night in the dark in a quick, hard passionate way, never to be mentioned again. 

So I came to him one night.  Fresh from a girl’s night out, fragrant with second hand smoke and beer.  He leaned close to smell my perfume and whispered “tonight you’re in charge”.  A blank page to write this story, to take what I want and break all the rules. 

Always so hard to start.  The first fumbling, embarrassing moments before the battle is lost.  I sat next to you,  feeling you so close and wanting so much.  Confidence from nowhere.  I put my hand on your knee, felt you quiver slightly (maybe the coolness of my skin, maybe the anticipation).  Slowly I brushed it up and down and back again, higher each time til I could feel you so hard against my hand.  In my naivety I wonder how you can get so hard so quickly from a few simple, indirect touches.  I move to the floor and kneel between your legs.  While I take off your shirt you voyage under mine, discovering my breasts and I suddenly understand how quickly the pace can change.  I need control.  I remove your hands then my shirt allowing you to look before I bend forward and take one of your nipples in my mouth.  Teasing, sucking, licking, biting – then the other.  Then offering you my breasts to taste and tease in return.  Control is slipping again.  So totally lost in the feeling that all I want to do is fuck and I must tell you or you sense it.  “Slow down babe, we’ve got all night”. 

A beginning.  The first time we’re not playing beat the clock.  I am so grateful.  My excitement eases and doubles at once.  I need to bring you to where I am – after all, I’m in charge.  I take off my skirt.  Wearing only knickers now I decide you are too well dressed for my liking.  I slide off your shorts, freeing your cock to the night air.  I take it in my mouth, tasting and teasing.  Measuring its length with hands and tongue.  So thick and I want it so badly.  Sucking, Licking.  Taking as much as I can in my mouth, trying to thrust it in.  Like your fingers.  They have found my wetness and entered it and my control is gone again.  I suck and lick and enclose your cock with my mouth,  following the motion you set with your fingers.  In and out, higher and harder and I’m lost in it, wanting more.  Wanting so desperately to have you inside me.   

I love the taste of you and how smooth you are in my mouth.  I love to know that you are enjoying it.  I get off when you take shorter breaths and occasionally moan.  I feel powerful from making you feel like this.  Power gives me confidence.  I abandon you for my own pleasure.  I stand over you, holding your face and pulling it forward.  You answer readily.  Your tongue is everywhere at once.  In and around me and I need you so badly it hurts.  But you know this, like you always know. 

You pull me down, your mouth coming up my body bit by bit.  Belly, chest, breast, nipple, neck.  And then you are looking at me, straight through me.  “Fuck it”, is  your response.  You kiss me – the last broken promise.  Long and sweet and for the first time I feel its me you want, not just the sex.  And then you are inside me, filling me, body and mind.  I can’t stand it and I am released. 

You stop, between kisses, asking me if I can manage it again.  I don’t think its possible to ever match that sensation but can only nod.  Not a voluntary movement, not capable of thought or speech.  You withdraw from me and it’s a new kind of hell without you.   

You are behind me, both of us kneeling on the ground.  You circle me with one hand on my breast and the other between my legs, and I’m with you again. 

Now the control is yours.  You take me hard.  You name the speed and thrust at will but for this moment I am your creature – a being of total sensation that you created.  You are so far inside me, harder and harder.  We both explode. 

There is no afterwards.  We talk of small things and I leave.  It is never mentioned again, what passed between us that night.  Then you moved on. 

So I stole these words from you.  You gave them to her and you will never know how much they meant to me. 

“It was not into my ear you whispered, but my heart.  It was not my lips you kissed but my soul” 

You touched my soul and left your prints forever upon it and  I will never forget. 


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