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The setting, the sky half concealed by a partial mask
of thunderclouds, stars and navy blue sky peeking through, the full moon
occasionally being reduced to a smudge of white light against the grey
clouds with the movements of the wind was eerie that night. The immense
mountain range that ran behind the small time he and I resided at that time
was a long, black silhouette against the whimsical sky. The skeleton-like
trees, stripped by the wind of leaves and bark groped desperately at the
sky, at some invisible lifeline above us. A frenzied wind whipped through
the town, the bushes and what was left of leaves on the trees scattered
generously throughout the small town. The night, the night that remains
fresh in my mind to this day was that of a party celebrating Christmas late
and New Year’s early. Held in a massive Grove Manor, the party was small
but wild, and I was delighted when he arrived. My eyes could have lit up the
darkened room when I was made aware of his presence. Strobe lights flashed,
my temples ached, and somehow, in the madness of the event, he had managed
to find me. He approached me from behind, brushed my mass of deep red hair
to one side and kissed my neck lightly.
After a while, the pop music and mindless, superficial chatter became
annoying, so we managed to separate from the group and disappear down one of
the darkened corridors. We wandered together, hand in hand, down the hallway
talking, laughing and generally enjoying one another’s company. When we
came upon a seemingly forgotten guestroom, dust coated and rustic at the far
west end of the house, we wandered in and he closed and bolted the door
behind us. The one window, on the west wall of the room was open and a
bitterly cold breeze filtered in from outside. Old-fashioned cloth curtains
billowed softly with the wind, and the only light in the room was that of
the moon outside. Barely illuminated in the dark, he came up behind me
again, placing his hands first awkwardly on my shoulders, then on my clothed
arms, then on my stomach. I leaned back, the back of my head resting on his
clavicle and lower neck, and I felt him nuzzle my neck. He began to kiss my
neck then, passionate but slowly, languidly even.
I placed my hands on top of his and moved them slightly lower, indicating my
desire to go farther. He was but a year older than I was, and felt
responsible for making sure that he didn’t pressure me to go any further
than I wanted to, meaning that I had to be the aggressor in the
relationship. As he kissed my neck, I tilted my head to the side, allowing
his lips to meet mine in what started as a soft peck. He drew back and
smiled at me, his supple mouth inches from mine. I pushed forward and our
lips fit together, so that I was sucking gently on his upper lip and he on
my full lower lip. I parted my lips and felt him slip his warm tongue in my
mouth, massaging mine, exploring the insides of my cheek. I kissed back and
turned my body so that it was facing his; I slipped my hands inside his coat
and wrapped my arms around his slim waist. He clasped his hands loosely
around my back and leaned against me. I felt him pushing slightly against me
and was greeted by a fiery sensation that coursed through my body. I felt my
legs go weak and was glad as he tightened his arms around me for fear I
would fall to my knees without his support. He pulled his mouth from mine
and smiled knowingly, conveying what I knew through my eyes. He immediately
blushed and dropped his eyes from mine. I moved one hand to the back of his
head and ran my fingers through his soft, shaggy blonde hair.
He looked up at me, sincerity in his eyes and said softly, “We’ll stop
any time. Just tell me if I’m going too far.”
“Skye”, I said in an equally honest tone, “I want you to be my first.
Tonight.” Before he had a chance to try and convince me otherwise, I spoke
again, “I love you. I know it’s a cliché, but I have never felt like
this before. Never. And before you ask, I’m sure.”
Those blue eyes of his were so full of love and devotion and honesty they
were threatening to drown me, but I didn’t avert my gaze. He stared into
my own red-tinted eyes for what seemed like an eternity. I was conscious of
everything: the breeze that ruffled my shock of amber bangs, him pressing
into me, that taunting, mocking sensation in my lower abdomen and my desire
and love for him. He was everything to me.
Finally, he drew in a breath and murmured, “I love you”, into my neck as
he swept me into an embrace so powerful I felt faint.
“I love you too”, I replied from the depths of my being.
Slowly, he drew back and pushed my long, black coat from my shoulders,
letting it crumple where it landed on the ground. I smiled as I felt the
cold encircle me as I stood, goose bumps rising to the surface of my skin. I
wore only a flimsy black-linen tank top and my black trousers. He slowly
lifted the hem of my blouse on his tapered fingers and hesitated, his eyes
never leaving mine. I moved my own hands to the bottom of my shirt and
helped him to lift it up over my head. As I folded it once, then dropped it
to the floor, I felt his eyes burning over my body. He stared down at me, an
Archaic smile on his sculpted face. I felt a sudden wave of self-conscious
anxiety sweep over me and I dropped my eyes smoothing my hands over my
stomach. My milky medium breasts were contained by a simple white cotton bra
and the soft plane of my stomach was pale and reflected a semblance of
untouched purity. He reached behind my head and pulled my long red hair over
my shoulders. I met his eyes, saw his smile and adopted one myself.
I moved forward and helped him out of his bulky black coat, letting it too
drop to the floor. He pulled off his black T-shirt himself and I tried not
to stare at his subtly muscular torso dusted with a slight bronzing. I ran
my hands lightly over the front of his chest, grazing his nipples, resting
on his shoulders; I leaned forward against him to kiss him and was topped by
the pleasing sensation of our bare flesh pressing together. We were close to
the small, single bed and, not letting him lose his hold on me, I groped my
way to it, sitting on the edge when I found it.
Quickly, I slid out of my trousers and left them, too on the floor. Eager
for this, eager for something I was yet to understand completely. He towered
over me and I undid the snake clasp of his pants, unzipped them, let them
fall. He squatted then, before me, before I had a chance to see, to
appreciate him fully.
“You’re sure you want to do this?” He asked again. His eyes were
hopeful but doubting; I smiled reassuringly and nodded. “I need to hear
you say it”, he said seriously.
“I’m sure; I won’t regret it Skye.” This seemed to please him, and
he stood again, allowing me to further undress him. I hesitated as I rested
my hands on his hips, index fingers hooked around the elastic hem of his
boxers, then, taking a discreet breath, I pulled them gently down, not
looking at him until he stepped out of them and kicked them aside. It
wasn’t strange to me but oddly beautiful, seeing a man naked for the first
time. I was almost at eye-level with his erect penis and I took the
opportunity to study it. I ran my finger up the underside of his shaft,
touched the swollen head lightly with my index and middle fingers and drew
back when he winced. His head was tilted back, his mouth slightly open and I
smiled, though he couldn’t see me. I leaned forward, curious but reluctant
and hesitantly licked the tender skin of his head. I felt him shudder and
smiled again to myself, knowing I was the first to ever touch him sensually.
Again, I leaned forward and took his head into my mouth completely, letting
my tongue swirl gently over it. I pushed my head forward slightly and moved
my tongue up and down the underside of his shaft, careful to keep my teeth
away. As I tasted and massaged his penis with my mouth, my curious hands
roamed freely over his testicles, tenderly touching his soft skin, then back
to the sensitive piece of flesh right before his anus. As I pressed my
finger lightly to it, Skye moaned loudly and I felt a drop of salty liquid
on my tongue. I withdrew and looked up at him; he was breathing hard, and as
he looked down at me I sensed a passion flicker between us that I hadn’t
known before.
I shifted on the bed so that I was lying vertically and he leaned over me.
His erect penis glistened with my saliva and I felt myself grow immensely
damp. Clumsily, he pulled the thin bra over my head and I smiled at him
lovingly. As he burrowed his face into my neck he let his hands casually
glide over my breasts stroking my nipples rhythmically. As I let out a moan,
he covered my mouth with his, probing me with his tongue as he cleverly
slipped a hand down past my navel, under the elastic hem of my cotton
panties, to my aching outer lips, entwining a finger in my soft amber curls
and brushing slightly against me. A tremor shot through my body with his
touch and I arched my back involuntarily towards him, forcing his finger
into me. I let out a moan against his tongue. I felt him smile against my
mouth and withdrew his unskilled hand. Slipping his hand under me, to the
small of my back, he pulled me toward him and murmured, “Are you ready?”
against my neck.
“Yes”, I moaned helplessly, “Yes, Skye…” There was a slight
awkwardness as he moved forward, trying to work himself into me, teasing me
accidentally as he brushed against me. I automatically moaned with every
touch of his body against mine, wanting him as close as possible, wanting
him inside me. I reached down and gently guided him to the right location.
He seemed to hesitate, prolonging suspense and my agonized pleasure. Then he
moved forward gently, pushing first his head into me, then tenderly working
more and more in. He settled his body against mine as he shifted his pelvis.
The long fingers of one hand were knotted in the hair at the nape of his
neck, the other hand spread on his sweat slicked back. I winced as he pushed
past the maidenhead; sensing my pain, he leaned down and kissed me. The
vaporous atmosphere settled over us, as we held each other, exploring one
another’s bodies with our hands. When at last he was completely inside me,
he began to pump instinctively. I arched my pelvis in rhythm with his
motions, trying not to moan with the overwhelming joy that I felt as he
moved closer and closer to me. I ran my hands over his back, slowly
massaging strained muscles, mussing his hair unconsciously. Reveling in the
moment, settling myself in the fact that we’re so close to each other,
loving the feel of his body against mine, I consciously said his name.
“Skye…”
He began to pump faster, a primal urgency engulfing him, then spreading to
me. He pushed into me, moaning as he ejaculated, then continuing to pump. At
once, I felt my body contract and a violent shudder passed through my body.
I moaned loudly, knowing no one could hear me as we were far from any
others. My body arched and a white, fiery glow settled over me, making me
tremble feverishly with an intense ecstasy foreign to me. He collapsed on
top of me and I clung to him desperately, lovingly. Holding him to me, I
settled into a state of oblivion, a freedom I hadn’t known before. Love
impassioned me and I tilted your chin, your luscious mouth to mine and
kissed you, hoping to convey all I felt with my lips and my tongue. As I
pulled away, you settled your face against my neck… At that moment, it was
clear to me as it is now. I loved you then, I love you now, and I will love
you always. Forever doesn’t begin to express it…
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